The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!!

Christmas used to be my most favorite time of the year. My favorite day of the year was Thanksgiving because it kicked off the Christmas season for me. My goal each year was to have my shopping finished and all the presents wrapped by Thanksgiving so that I could just totally enjoy the Christmas season. I loved the building anticipation each day brought as we inched closer and closer to Christmas. Then my kids got older and I somehow lost my rhythm. For the past few Christmases, everything has been done in a last minute rush and my favorite day of the year has become Daylight Savings Time day - when we get our hour back. This year, a little of the excitement has returned as my grandson, Tucker is 16 months old and I can just see the wonderment in his eyes. I can just see the wheels turning as he processes all these new sights and sounds. That baby just takes my breath away! I cherish every second I get to spend with him and he truly makes my life better! I think this Christmas will be the most fun I have had in a while! Merry Christmas to all of you and Happy New Year! What are some of your resolutions this year?

Don't pass out..........

Finally, a new entry! It has been a busy, crazy place around here! We just moved into our dream home and I do believe we will never move again. We are in love with it! My grandson, Tucker will be one year old on July 31st and last weekend was my 30 year class reunion. I was on the reunion committee so towards the end, it was all consuming!! It was a great reunion and so many people I never dreamed would come, came and the people who usually make everyone uncomfortable with their catty remarks, etc didn't come! It was like the perfect reunion. My brother and sister-in-law (who are missionaries in the Ukraine) were even here - my sister-in-law is also a classmate of mine. They have been in the states for a few weeks for some major family additions - one daughter was married on top of a mountain in Switzerland in June, her oldest son is getting married this Saturday in Louisville, and her oldest daughter is having a c-section on August 11th in Arkansas! Then, on the 18th they will head back to Kiev and I can't hardly think about it. They have been all over the country in the weeks that they have been here but their stops here in West Virginia have been such great times!

I will update more very soon, I promise - I just wanted everyone to know that I am still alive and kickin'! Also, the people I wrote about in the last entry are doing well. My lung transplant blogger friend is home but battling a type of lung cancer that can occur in transplant patients so please keep her in your prayers and my blogger friend that was going to have a baby that they had been told couldn't survive outside of the womb got to spend 3 and a half hours with her baby for which they were incredibly grateful. They are doing ok, but would covet your prayers.

I promise more soon! Especially pictures of my grandson, who takes my breath away.....

xoxo
Q

People That Need Our Help...

Hey Everyone - Happy Friday!

There are a couple of blogs I would like anyone who looks at my blog to visit and leave an encouraging comment if you can after reading their stories.

The first is a woman's blog - a broken hearted woman who is pregnant with her fourth child. This child will be born this Monday, April 7th at 4:00 and will almost certainly not survive outside of her womb. The baby's name is Audrey Caroline and she has multiple problems and no amniotic fluid. This lady's blog is so charming as she describes her wonderful life and the every day happenings with her 5 year old twins and her 2 year old. Mixed in all the charm and sweetness, is what else is going on in her and her husband's life. Please stop by http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com and leave her an encouraging comment if you could. I know she could sure use it and would certainly appreciate it.

The second blog is the husband of a CF patient (cystic fibrosis). I have also followed this blog for several months and this family has been through the process of being listed for a double lung transplant, to an unexpected pregnancy, to the birth of their precious daughter at 25 weeks, to a double lung transplant on April 2nd. Please visit http://cfhusband.blogspot.com and leave them some well wishes and read their story as well.

Blogs like the 2 mentioned above make me very thankful for my life and make me see how trivial and selfish I can be at times. Both of these families have powerful testimonies and live by what they believe with every fiber of their being. Truly inspiring.

Have a great weekend!
Q

Tucker - 7 Months

Wow - how time flies. Here is the latest picture of Tucker, he is just too cute not to post!!!

Well, scroll all the way down to the bottom of the page to see his gorgeous picture until I figure out how to get it in this post. Anyone out there know what I did wrong??? :)

The Story of Me

I think I am going to use my blog as a journal so I can figure out who I am at this point in my life. I think I might be having a mid-life crisis but not if it means I need a new red sports car and an affair. I don't think I need either one of those, thank you very much. I am just lost. I don't know any other way to say it. And when I try to explain it to my husband or close friends, I am blank. I was in therapy for a long time and I remember once the therapist asked me if I had all the money in the world, a happy, settled family and could do anything I wanted, what would it be? I couldn't think of one thing. I am not exaggerating - nothing. I have devoted my life to other people (raising children, friends in need) and I have always been a fixer. If something is wrong somewhere then I am going to fix it. We went through some family things that were not fixable which landed me in 3 years of therapy. Evidently I need to go back, huh?

I probably should make my blog more anonymous, maybe I will need to start all over to do that. I am in a very weird place right now and the only thing that makes me happy is my beautiful grandbaby. I get to watch him every other week while his parents work and it is the only time I feel alive. Thank God for my precious grandchild!

We will start with the basics: My parents were born in London and Scotland, respectively, my oldest brother and I were born in Canada, my younger brother and sister were born in Pennsylvania so how the hell did we end up in a tiny little town in West Virginia? I am married (for the second time) to a wonderful guy, I have two daughters (27 & 22) and three stepsons (23, 20, 18). My house was the "hang out" house while my children were growing up, which was fine with me because then I knew where they were, who they were with and what they were doing. 2 of my stepsons came to live with us as soon as they were old enough to and the youngest is the last child at home. He is a senior in High School and he will be the death of me. He is cute as a button, charming as hell, and in trouble all the time. I am very intuitive so I figure things out quickly. He, on the other hand, thinks I have spies planted everywhere to spy on him and tell on him. I can't tell him what he is doing to get caught at everything or else he will know not to do those things anymore. My girls told him long ago that I knew everything. They didn't know how or who told me but I would know gossip from their school before they did. They think I have ESP. They told him not to test it, but.....................he didn't believe them. So needless to say I am way ahead in this game. My husband works out of town most of the time which makes it hard for me because I don't want to be the evil "step-monster". But I think we have a good relationship and so I just tell him how it is and then I listen to his side (and then tell him why his side is wrong :)

I worked outside the home before I graduated from High School and worked up until 4 years ago. The company I worked for was closing their office that was located in my area and they were going to let me work out of my house until they reopened about 6 months later. They were going to let the other office girls go. So my husband and I talked about it and I decided that I would let one of the girls who was a single mother and struggling have the "work from home" position and I would quit. This was when my youngest daughter was a senior is High School and my youngest stepson didn't live with us yet. My oldest stepson did live with us but he was a year and a half older than my daughter and in college already. So the plan was after my daughter graduated and entered college that I would travel with my husband on some of his business trips. I have never been one to leave my kids - when they were young I couldn't bear to leave them for the weekend because I hadn't seen them as much as I would have liked while working all week - and when they got older, I wouldn't leave them because I knew there would be parties at my house! I always told my kids, "I was born at night, but not last night" when they tried to get stuff over on me! Anyway, now that they were a little older, I figured if I traveled a little with my husband, they may have some company but not wild parties. I didn't get to test that theory out, though, as that same summer my youngest stepson came to live with us.

OK, this is a good place to take a break and let everything I just told you soak in. Just wanted to give you a glimpse into our family dynamic. I will pick it up from here the next time I post.

Til next time,
Q

Interesting Stuff....

I can't credit whoever wrote this and I would if I could, but I am going to post it anyway. I would like to live my life like this:

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the one's who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

Words to live by......
Q

And so it begins......

Hello everyone,

I am having one of those days where you realize how old you are and then you wonder "Is this it?, Is this all there is?" It is time to start planning our 30 year high school reunion. 3o years. That is a really. long. time. We had our first meeting last week and sorted out who would find who and how, where we should have it, when, etc. etc. I remember for our 10th class reunion we fundraised for over a year and planned it down to the tiniest detail. We burned ourselves out so badly that for the 20th reunion, none of the original crew would have anything to do with planning it. I remember I only went to the Friday night festivities because our family was leaving for the beach the next morning bright and early. Of course, that is when all my kids lived at home and the stepkids who hadn't moved in with us yet were with us for the summer. I couldn't have cared less about my 20th class reunion. That was the busiest time of my life. My oldest child had just graduated (which means she is planning her 10 year reunion) and the rest were 14, 12, 11, and 10. We were busy. Busy beyond belief. Funny thing, I can hardly remember that period of my life...........

Anyway, back to the subject - my 30th reunion. When I was younger, I used to think my 30th reunion would be so much different than it is going to be. Is it because all of us are in denial about our age? I thought that my husband would be bald (at least on top) and gray, and I would be in the phase of going to the beauty shop once a week to "get my hair done". When we graduated, it seemed like the 30 year reunion was a lifetime away - and yet - here it is.

I wonder if I am at the beginning of a mid-life crisis? I can't believe this is all there is. With the exception of babysitting my beautiful grandson my life is totally boring. I used to work 8-5, run home and fix dinner and then we always had some sort of ballgame to go to - either for cheerleading or for the boys who were playing. On the weekends my girls used to cheer for a competitive cheerleading squad and we were at they gym all weekend for practicing. You know the competitions you see on ESPN? That is they type of cheerleading I am talking about. The kind that actually is a sport. My daughter was interviewed on ESPN once - that was pretty cool! She also won 2 National Championships before she graduated so that was REALLY cool! Back then, I couldn't wait until the last game was over and the last check had been written because after 5 children, I WAS TIRED. But now I am bored. Again I ask - is that all there is? To be bone tired or bored silly? Where is the in-between? And please don't tell me to take up a hobby because I am so not artistic enough to do any sort of crafts. All I know is accounting and raising children.

So I am making up the questionairre that will go out to everyone and when I think of my answers, I am blank. What do I do now? Nothing. What does your spouse do? Oh, well he is very successful but he is out of town. every. week. without. exception. I could go with him but the 18 year old (boy) that still lives at home would have a blow-out party - there is no doubt in my mind about that - and I couldnt go with him every other week because I babysit my grandson those weeks and I wouldn't give that up for a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g - he is the only thing that I look forward to. And where it says to list my accomplishments - well, my whole life has centered around my kids so I really didn't accomplish anything except to raise a bunch of kids and be totally involved in everything they do. I did that because I knew what it felt like not to have anyone at my "stuff" to watch me and I never wanted them to feel that way. My mom and dad are great but they just didn't get too involved with my older brother and me because my younger brother and sister were much younger and they were busy with them. I guess I kind of understand that but I also don't understand at the same time - but that is for another post! What will my answers on my questionairre be? And at the same time, who cares? Maybe I won't even go, maybe we will plan our vacation for the same time and I will tragically be out of town. My 2 best friends in the whole world from high school are still my best friends now and I get to see and talk to them anytime I want - which is great. I am very thankful for my true friends because I realize they are hard to come by.

I guess the problem isn't really my class reunion - I guess it is because I am going through a phase where I am really wondering if this is all there is. I know the alternative is death and I certainly don't want to die but if every day from now til I am 90 years old is going to be the same then.........ugh. Any suggestions out there?

xoxo
Q